Good Aussie bloke Chris Hemsworth out with his family.
Source: Splash News Australia
THE first teacher in everyone’s life is their parents. Whether it’s providing wisdom on how to dress or how to choose a career, a man’s parents are responsible for assisting him in becoming the man he wants to be.
AskMen asked their top writers and experts to share the parental lessons that have made them the better men they are today.
1. Carry the heavy stuff
Ian Lang, AskMen’s Dating & Relationship Correspondent
It’s fine to help with inside chores, but anything heavy or dirty is a man’s job. Mum spent two hours buying the groceries, so she shouldn’t have to carry them all in, too. It’s not that women or younger siblings can’t or aren’t willing to do these things, but you weren’t gifted with superior size and strength for nothing. There are precious few opportunities left for men to show off in a physical way and offering yourself up as the occasional pack animal is about as unobjectionable as it gets
2. Love is better than money
Peter Hoare, AskMen’s Men’s Lifestyle Correspondent
My parents have always made a point to convey how important relationships are, in the sense that at the end of the day, when the rollercoaster is nearing the end of its run, what we’ll all value the most in life are the relationships we’ve formed, not the money we’ve made. It’s something all too few of us consciously think about. As a whole, our society is one that’s collectively money-hungry. And, honestly, to a point that’s just an unfortunate life necessity. But monetary issues aside, it’s the connections we form with other human beings that we should appreciate more than anything else.
David Beckham loves hanging out with his kids. Picture: Ap
Source: AP
3. Your problems are the family’s problems
Michael McKenna, AskMen’s Foreign & Current Affairs Correspondent
One of the benefits of a ‘50s English grammar school education is that you internalise the works of men like John Donne in much the way I would later internalise The Simpsons. We have never talked about it, but I have come to assume that this bit of fatherly wisdom is a hand-me-down from the “No man is an island” poet, and -- as I also was given to learn -- there’s nothing wrong with a hand-me-down. As a member of a family, you are a part of an organic unit and when you go through hard times they all feel it. This is at once a form of support and a motivation to limit their exposure to your bad decisions: How many serious kitchen table talks do you really want to cause?
4. You only have one family
Adam Fox, AskMen’s Fashion Expert
Friends will come and go throughout your life, but only a select few people on this planet can be called family. Sure, tensions can run high sometimes (especially over, say, something like Christmas dinner), but in the end, being there for each other is the single most important job we have in life.
5. Family first
Simon Majumdar, AskMen’s Food & Culture Correspondent
I am sure I am not alone in being taught the lesson that blood is thicker than water, but it is something that my father has been keen to reinforce in all of his children for all of our lives. While me may not always get on -- few siblings do -- I know for certain that if and when any serious event happens I will be able to depend on my family for support whatever the circumstances.
All round good bloke Matthew McConaughey and wife Camila Alves. (AP Photo/Evan Agostini)
Source: AP
6. I love you but at 18 you’re out
Michael McKenna, AskMen’s Foreign & Current Events Correspondent
My family is not Italian, Greek or Portuguese -- we are English. So when you turn 18, you are expected to go away. Without any disrespect to the more (literally) accommodating folkways of the Mediterranean world, I would have taken a lot longer to become independent had I thought of the family home as an appropriate place for a 25-year-old. There have been some bleak little furnished rooms along the way -- and one disgustingly cockroach-heavy London bedsit -- but residentially I have been on my own since I was a teenager, and on balance I think that has been a good thing.
7. You don’t get to pick them but you still have to love them
Ian Lang, AskMen’s Dating & Relationships Correponsdent
Everyone has relatives that aren’t their favourite people, but you still have to give them a place to crash should the need arise. It’s also on everyone to do their part to keep family ties strong. Even if spending an hour on the phone talking to a family member isn’t anyone’s idea of a good time, it’s worth doing. After all, these are the people you’ll fall back on when you inevitably hit hard times of your own. Sometimes it’s nice to know there are people who will hear you out without agenda or judgement.
Deborra-Lee Furness and good guy Hugh Jackman and kids
Source: Supplied
8. Never let family become strangers
Peter Hoare, AskMen’s Men’s Lifestyle Correspondent
On my father’s side, the majority of my entire family lives in the same state. And we’re not all that spread out. In fact, if I wanted to drive to every single one of my uncles and aunts houses in one afternoon, I absolutely could. My family has always been very appreciative of the fact that we’re all very close, both personally and geographically. On my mother’s side, sadly, it’s very much the opposite. My mother and her three sisters each live in a different state. That being said, as a child, damn near every night I’d hear my mum on the phone with one of my aunts, staying just as close as if they still lived under the same roof.
9. Never go to bed angry
Adam Fox, AskMen’s Fashion Expert
My mother is a pretty great guilt-tripper, but I think she’s right about this one. Although there’s a time to argue and even outright fight with your family, you should never shut off the lights for the night when there’s something left to say. After all, none of us ever know when we’ll be shutting off those lights for the last time.
10. Families forgive
Simon Majumdar, AskMen’s Food & Culture Correspondent
As I said, the members of most families don’t always get on with each other. However, my father has always been very keen for me and my siblings to talk through any of our problems and try to solve any disagreements amicably. It isn’t always easy and I am sure that we sometimes let him down, but I do know that I am definitely more forgiving of the failings of my brothers and sister than I am of some others, and I also know they are more forgiving of my own many failings.
source: news.com.au
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